As if rape was not enough of trauma in a person’s life, the very sensitive world strives hard to add its share to it. While the victim tries hard to be a survivor, people do all they can to put hurdles in the way by being absolute assholes. There is no dearth of ways to do it for these people, who by the look of it, are, quite jobless. How else would they have time for the following?
1. Stupid Questions
‘Was it, like, a proper rape?’
No, it was very improper. Assuming, by ‘proper’, you mean ones in which the woman is violated visibly, with injuries on the body, a lot of blood spewed around and intestines pulled out. For you, it would have been really ‘proper’ if the woman had been killed, but now that you know that she survived, why not try to find out how ‘proper’ the experience was. Friend, everything ‘proper’, up there, in your head? Do you have one at all?
2. Horrible Medical Procedures
Two fingers are usually used to, well, pick up things in your house which stink, like your dirty underwear. But this country thinks that it can be used to find out if a woman has been raped or not. The Supreme Court said that this procedure is bullshit, but most doctors still think that inserting their two fingers in the vagina of a victim is the best way to find out if she was raped. Forget that this cannot determine rape at all, it is nothing short of rape itself. So next time you doctors think that you can have a few laughs on whether the woman is ‘habituated to sex’ or not by inserting your fingers in her private parts, have a laugh on yourself. You just turned your profession into a crime. That what they taught you at medical school?
3. Horrible Police Procedures
‘Let’s see you naked. You’ve been raped anyway’ is the usual attitude of the police when it comes to rape. Police usually assume that once a woman has been raped, she can be sexually harassed at will. After all, she does not have anything to ‘lose’. So rape victims are asked to strip in front of officers. They ask women to ‘show’ them how they were raped. Stop there for a while. Ever tried imagining the same happening to you after you have been stabbed? You go to lodge an FIR and the police thrust a knife in your hand and say ‘let’s see how you were stabbed’. Would you like that?
4. The Media Muck
Once you complain, the media also has to do their magic by being absolutely insensitive. They do all they can to sprinkle enough ‘hints’ so that the identity of the complainant is revealed. The language deployed by most media while reporting rape is similar to ones seen in soft porn books that high school kids used to read in secret. Nobody knows the reasons for this behaviour but it could be general human ideology that you should strive to make other people’s lives miserable. It is no secret that people look at rape victims as women who have ‘lost’ their honour and also ‘sluts’, if they so prefer. The media also dig into the victim’s personal life as though that is what determines the fate of the case and the woman. Err…ever thought of doing journalism, for a change, folks?
5. Leaders. Really?
Political leaders and religious leaders, and these days it is difficult to tell between the two, think of commenting on rape as their moral duty. Moral and duty are both fine things, but bullshit definitely is not. Usually, that is what they come up with when there is a rape. We have a wide range of politicians who make victims feel horrible with comments which are always blaming them. Rape, for them, is essentially about clothes worn by the victim, what they eat, where they work, who they stay with and what gods they pray to. By the time these leaders think of patriarchy as the reason for rape, the victim would be dead. Both things that the leaders would like very much, for sure.
So while you decide on techniques to use to further harass a rape victim, stop. It won’t be hard to think of a couple of other matters. Like, what exactly gives you the right to even open your mouth when you yourself contribute to the rape culture? You who find rape ‘jokes’ funny and take pleasure in passing comments on your colleagues’ bodies. You really think you have any space in this discourse? Well, high time you thought of it. If you are used to thinking, that is.